Just say Yes, And

When I was doing stand-up comedy in Los Angeles (yes, you read that right. I was doing stand-up comedy in LA.), there was a show going on at the time – that they turned into a movie – called The Kings of Comedy starring some of the very best in the field: Cedric the Entertainer, Bernie Mac, Steve Harvey and DL Hughley. They were some of my favorites, my role models, and really, they were true Kings of comedy as they sold out everywhere they went while the rest of us were trying to get a handful of people to listen and dare I say, laugh, from darkly lit, small stages while they waited for their drink to arrive. And 25 years later, the stand up Kings are still leaders in the field having branched out to movies, TV, talk shows, game shows, entertainment empires.

Meanwhile, at my house, my kids have been watching reruns of Shark Tank, after quitting a super successful comedy career (not) I became a researcher with an expertise in decoding business pitches. I can tell you what “works” when pitching to investors. In fact, I could pretty accurately predict without even hearing the words, which pitches would be selected by investors. Secret skills!

I encourage viewing Shark Tank for my young kids. I am cultivating my future nest egg, when my kids become Titans of Industry. Which now seems like the only way to be successful in this country. As I listened to Shark feedback, which was nonsensical as clearly these men didn’t know the product or the market being pitched, it’s no wonder we have a government run by almost trillionaire Elon Musk! Just like we can blame the Apprentice show for the ‘comeback’ of Donald Trump…we should blame Shark Tank for Elon Musk and DOGE.

Why? The show has built a mythology of “successful entrepreneurs” that who, now as investors, know everything. The little people with their little businesses come in and grovel for attention – just like the in the medieval world – come to beg to the King. Bend the knee. The Sharks even look like they are in “thrones” seated while the peasant stands before them and ‘pitches’ – if they aren’t doing something that doesn’t bore the Shark…they might have a chance of some pittance, some alms. Alms for the poor!

Shark Tank has helped craft a culture of worshipping the super rich entrepreneur. Donald Trump has ‘successful businessman’ cult following – to quote him “only he” can fix the government. Lots of people fervently believe this. The reality of how they built it is not always an “only he” story though. (Take Elon Musk – his family owned shares in an emerald mine! Jeff Bezos had $250K start-up capital for Amazon from his parents. And as Malcolm Gladwell pointed out in his book Outliers 20 years ago – Bill Gates had rich parents and extra hours of training time by access to computers when he was in high school at his prestigious private school.) Sure they worked hard, but as they say – these guys were born on 3rd base but they – and we – think they hit a triple.

Our deification of successful entrepreneurs – billionaires – has led to our believing that everything they say is The Word of God. They know better. They know best because they made it. Never mind the failures they had. Or the idiotic choices they made. Shark Tank is about whatever they say IS true. It’s their opinion over science or facts. Sound familiar?

And the poor entrepreneur peasants groveling for their investment dollars listen. Some of their suggestions are ok, but some are downright silly. And it’s all just their opinions. Doesn’t mean what they say is right or even a good suggestion.

One of my business school classmates has become a tech guru – he gets invited to the super high end, super secret, tech bro conferences in Silicon Valley. He told me after being at this conference that they – the Billionaire tech bros – are all ‘different’ people. They’re not like us. Money, major money, changes men. I say men, because men do these strange competitive things that women don’t. Like building personal rockets for space. Or buying the biggest yacht possible. (Remember when rich men used to just buy the fastest most expensive car?? Those days feel nostalgic now with the amount of money these few men have made…) And just like Kings of yore, they have all built compounds – Musk in Texas, Zuckerberg in Hawaii, Bezos in Seattle… apparently they fear the ‘common’ man rising up, taking over…so they build fortified castle compounds to keep the little people far away.

Now, with Trump, they apparently want to have ALL the money with tax cuts, cutting government programs, privatizing social services into for-profit (for themselves) so they cozy up to the President Emperor and give their respect like the good feudal Kings they are. The Captains of Industry, the robber barons from a hundred years ago became major philanthropists. Bezos could provide every school in the US with the supplies kids need instead of our teachers having to have donation boxes or paying for markers and crayons with their own money instead of a space tourist rocket. Or he could have built an enormous amount of affordable housing instead of a yacht for his yacht. While they accumulate and hoard all the money, they live in fear that one day the peasants will rise up and scale their castle compound walls. But we have enabled these super rich, ‘self-made’ gods of business, to be the Kings of the Economy. We have no one to blame but ourselves. And maybe Shark Tank.